Navigating Work as Caregivers

Navigating through a loved one’s mental health crisis is already hard enough, but having to do it while you have to show up to a job is another thing.

Now, I might be in the minority here, but going to work was actually an escape for me. At times I had to carry my phone with me in case he called, but for the most part, I enjoyed the forced distraction.

But how do we navigate working? How do we switch from caregiver to worker without one overshadowing the other? Going to work can be a lifesaver for some, and knot turning for others. Here are a few helpful tips that I’ve learned over the last 10 years of working through regular days to crisis days to hospital days.

Focus On the Moment: sometimes the whole day ahead of us can feel overwhelming, so try to take the current task and focus on just that. Sometimes it helps to write out what needs to get done. Visually when I see it down on paper, it actually helps me focus better and hone in on what needs to be done.

Create Boundaries: there were times when I always carried the phone with me just in case he needed to call, but I found I was always looking and thinking about it ringing – to the point that I was distracted from doing my job. So, create spaces throughout the day when you put the phone on silence or put it in your bag or desk drawer. You can tell your loved one you’ll be unavailable for this period of time (maybe have another family member or friend be available instead). Or, if it’s important to have your phone with you, the boundary could revolve around how long you spend on the phone.

Make Yourself a Priority: What are some things you can do for yourself throughout the day that does not revolve around your loved one. It could look like:

1. Walks at lunch, or just getting outside for 15 minutes, especially when the spring finally comes and that sun is bright and cheerful
2. Choosing healthier options. When we are stressed we might look for the quick, comfort food from the food court, or might reach for the chocolate or junk food in the lunch room. Instead, bring your own lunch from home, or fruit and choose healthier swaps if you go out.
3. Cutting back on the habits that cause stress, like drinking something other than coffee.
4. How do you spend your commute? On a train or in a car? Try listening to a podcast on a topic that is an interest of yours.
5. What options might be available for exercise before work or at lunch. Perhaps a Yoga class, or a gym if that helps too.
6. Meditation. Can you find a quiet space to meditate? Breathing and just refocusing – even finding a quiet spot to read, like a park near work, or empty office. You can find guided meditation via YouTube or Spotify. Here is an example
7. Join a virtual support group. There are daytime ones available through St. Joes Healthcare

Journaling: This might be a hard one to do for some people, but journaling can actually be helpful – there is a lot going on in our heads, especially as we juggle multiple things, including those days when things are just bad. So, getting it out of your head and onto paper in a constructive way can be a benefit to our mental health.

This is a great place to start: Journaling for Beginners

Juggling work and a life that is demanding is stressful. Being a caregiver adds more responsibility to your load and it can be exhausting.

The one thing I’ve learned, and am still learning, is that even if it’s small, you need to prioritize your own space. Your work is important and you deserve to give it your all. Implementing even just one action, like going for a walk at lunch, or taking a virtual support class can make all the difference.